I’m more into year-round resolutions than New Year’s resolutions, which is good since it’s already the end of February. Avoiding an over emphasis on a single day, but respecting your goals and aspirations with a 365-day commitment – a daily commitment – is much more powerful and purposeful in the long term. I have perhaps a revolutionary resolution to present to you all. It’s one that can save you brain space, time and energy, and refocus your mind on things of greater importance. What we focus on is what matters to us; what matters to us shapes how we live! If you’re ready to live a better, more holistic 2020 and beyond and build a life with one less unimportant tenant in it, let me introduce you to a brilliant 2020 new year – new decade – resolution: Let us not comment on bodies!! Positive, negative, neutral, there is no good or productive reason to comment on someone’s body. You are reading that right. It doesn’t matter if it is a comment *you feel* is positive, or you make a nasty public comment from a place less than positive, there’s no place for either. People’s bodies are their bodies. (It would do us all good to view our own with a little more light too 🙂 )
Everyone lives in a different, unique body – they are powerful! People’s true power is not in fitting a certain size dictated optimal or appealing or sexy or alluring or desired by culture. People’s true power is in recognizing their personal autonomy, their freedom, their mental capacity to own themselves and their actions, and to live as they wish! There are A LOT of worthless comments online – pretty certain we all know this. Here is a topic we can put to rest, since a commonality expressed by many of us is our lack of time and subsequent desire for more. Most people report being short on self-esteem and self-acceptance too. There are a lot greater things you can do in a year: understanding yourself and your motives better, accepting who you are – your brilliance and those areas you’d like to change, judging less, being more free, upping personal accountability, acquainting yourself with your likes and goals, brining your dreams from the dark into the light, etc; really, this one is pretty basic: Hold the body centered. Comment.
Do they seem too thin to you? Ok, that’s great. Your unprofessional, unsolicited opinion is not welcome. If you fancy yourself a morally upright, caring person, ask yourself first: what is my motivation for this comment? Ask yourself again, what is my true motivation for this comment? What do I hope to gain from this comment? If the humxn this comment is directed at reads my comment, is it likely to elicit the desired response? If someone were to say this to me in this circumstance, would it be helpful? What better thing can I say that has more to do with this humxn and their being and power and gifts and less to do with their looks and how they fit into society’s current mold? If there is nothing else to say, it probably makes sense to refrain from commenting. You think that person looks sick? Maybe they are. Maybe it has nothing to do with food. Consider how you view health. Even if you are a doctor, this view is likely heavily influenced by culture, familiarity and personal experience. These thoughts don’t even touch on the medical side – that “overweight” people can be healthier than “skinny,” that a smaller body does not mean malnourished, that what you see is a miniscule fraction of a much larger, and, may I remind you, personal story.
Hey, it’s 2020. How about we comment on things that matter, reach out if we really want to effect change, and be conscious that even if it’s coming from the right place there are probably several more steps to take before a comment is warranted. Then, if you’ve done your work to heal your past and present traumas, and your reach is one of support AND one that’s reciprocal or asked for, by all means reach out and don’t stop supporting. Cheers friends to loving yourselves and loving others, and that doing those things brings out the best in all.
Melissa Teeple 